Thursday, March 8, 2012

What Would My Sixteen Year Old Self Think?


The other day I hung out with one of my best friends who I have known since the ninth grade. Both of us lost our jobs and are currently trying to figure out what's next. We both came to the same conclusion, we don't want to settle. I spent ten years at a job that I didn't love and I don't want to do that again. I want to wake up and be happy to start my day, not dread it. More importantly during this conversation I asked him what would our sixteen year old selves think of us now. We both laughed because we knew each other better than ourselves and the words didn't even need to be said out loud. Our sixteen year old selves would be disappointed.

We always had big dreams. Huge. Indestructible was our mentality and nothing was going to stop us. The world was an open floor plan and we were going to conquer it. We were going to build a life of adventure that would lead to success.

My dream was to travel the world. Work (possibly for a magazine) and live in NYC and go to work dressed in the latest designer fashions. I'd have late night meetings at local high end bars and spend my weekends at the museums and in Central Park. I'd have a stack of Playbills on my bookshelf and an active social life, constantly pushing myself to learn and discover new things.

Obviously none of that happened. Well, I can't say none of it. I do have a stack of Playbills that now is a constant reminder that I should have saved my money instead of spending it. And that's the thing. When I was sixteen money wasn't an issue. I didn't think about how much it would cost to fly to Egypt and to Italy. I didn't realize that I would need to work a full time job while I went to college full time and that when you have a job you can't decide one day to drive across country. You have responsibilities. And I. I took the responsible route. My sixteen year old self would have taken the other route and sometimes I wonder, if I would have let her make the decisions, how different my life would be.

So I've decided that I'm going to live to make my sixteen year old self happy. When I was sixteen I lived life to the fullest, or as full as I could with a curfew and no license. I miss the girl who would take on a challenge without knowing all the details because she simply wanted to. The girl who rarely said no and would give everything a shot at least once.

I think that is why so many people enjoy YA books. It brings you back to a time in your life when you had the world in front of you and the only person who could stop you was you. But why can't you live that way at twenty-seven? At fifty? At seventy-five? The only person that can stop you, is you.

What would your sixteen year old self think of you now?

14 comments:

  1. What a fabulous post!

    I think I was probably the opposite of you. I was very sensible as a teen, but on the flip side of that, I never looked far into the future to have a load of ideas about what I wanted to do. I guess my sixteen year old self would probably mock me for attempting to be a writer lol!

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    1. Thanks :)

      Mock you and then be like, "So I can I read it?" lol.

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  2. Very honest post - thanks for sharing with us! I don't give my 16-year-old self too much credit: she thought she'd be in love with Harrison Ford forever. Little did she know he'd age like moldy cheese :)

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    1. I actually laughed out loud, that is great!

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  3. Interesting thing to think about! I think my 16-y/o self would think I was doing okay. I made a few bumpy choices here and there that she'd probably smack me on the head for (like NOT taking that trip to Europe when I had the chance), but 16 y/o me wanted to be a writer too. ;)

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    1. You had the chance to go to Europe and... Okay I won't be your 16 year old self. lol! Besides I'm sure you will get there one day.

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  4. Even though 16 was only four years ago for me I definitely didn't think I would be where I am - still living at home and trying to write! I thought I would be studying English at uni, living in London, generally being fabulous...oh well, I can still try to be fabulous where I am, right?

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    1. Exactly! You can be fabulous anywhere!

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  5. When I was 16 I wasn't living life to the fullest, but rather in survival mode. I had already stopped dreaming too. I did see the world though. I moved to Germany the day I turned 18 and lived there for a few years. I think I have more dreams now than I did then and I am slowly them making them a reality. :) Good things come to those who wait I suppose. ;) I love the honest post! I look forward to hearing what choices you make for that 16-year-old in you.

    And I've tagged you for the Lucky 7 Meme. You can stop by to see the rules. I look forward to reading your work!

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    1. I would love to visit Germany one day! My 16 year old self would be like, well why haven't you already? lol. But like you said good things come to those who wait :)And that's awesome that you are making your dreams a reality!

      Awesome :)

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  6. My sixteen year old self would be thinking...A WRITER?? You want to be a writer??? You hate writing! haha. ;)

    Great post and so true. Let's live baby! :)

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    1. Ha! That's great. And yes! Let's live!!! :)

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  7. I miss being 16 too. I prefer that dreamer age where laws of reality don't apply.

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    1. If we could just go back there! But until I can find a time machine I'll continue to write about being 16. lol

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